Wow, so much has happened since I last posted on my beloved blog. I used to adore writing in this space and sharing the ups and downs of my awkward Black girl life. I believed despite being in law school, I could remain consistent. Sadly, I overestimated my abilities and underestimated how challenging law school would be. It sucks the life out of you until the only energy you have left is spent eating a meal, showering, and hitting the pillow. To that end, I fell behind. I hope you can forgive me. Now, that I’ve graduated and begun a new chapter of my life that allows me to decide my schedule, I feel a burst of energy. How exciting to feel well enough to write again!

In other news, I turned 25 years old this month, and it has been a journey getting here. Scientifically, your brain is supposed to be fully developed at 25, so I guess there is no longer an excuse for being a knucklehead anymore. But the truth is, I still feel 12 years old—unsure of myself, worried about making friends, and fighting off acne on my forehead. All of those challenges remain, except now I have a light bill to pay too.

Recently, there’s been a saying used commonly on TikTok, “I’m just a girl”. While it’s mostly used by women 20 years and older as a funny comment about not wanting to be treated like an adult with all of the adult responsibilities, it’s sort of become an ideology or way of life to me. I think, “Crap! I made a mistake!”, but then remind myself, “I’m just a girl.” For me, it’s a small extension of grace or a minor acknowledgment that I still have so much to learn. Similar to the Hannah Montana anthem, we all need a reminder that nobody is perfect.

I recently read a criticism of this funny TikTok trend. A woman said that she thought the saying had a minimizing effect that allowed women to deny accountability. I think I disagree with this sentiment. At the end of the day, I am aware that I am an adult woman, but I also recognize that many of the struggles I face today stem from a time when I was just a young girl. To me, reminding myself that I am just a girl is truly reminding myself that there is a wounded inner child still inside of me that guides my self-consciousness. That there’s an inner child in all of us.

These days, the world requires so much of us. We have to have the most followers, the clearest skin, the healthiest relationships, the nicest car, the newest iPhone, and anything that the influencers tell us will make our lives better. It can feel so hard and exhausting to exist. But in this 25th year, I’ve decided to extend grace to myself. I may be 25, but I can still snuggle a stuffed animal after a hard day at work. I can color a coloring book when I feel anxious. I can have a playdate with my best friends. I can tell myself that when I fall, I can get back up again because life didn’t end when I was 12, and it won’t end at 25. I am just a woman, just a girl, just a human trying to navigate life’s challenges.

So, next time you feel yourself being unkind or harsh with yourself, remember there’s a little you inside just trying to figure the world out. Be patient and kind to yourself.

I hope you have a beautiful and blessed day! See you next time. x, Dom

Now That My Frontal Lobe Has Developed....

I turned 25 years old this month, and it has been a journey getting here. Scientifically, your brain is supposed to be fully developed at 25, so I guess there is no longer an excuse for being a knucklehead anymore. But the truth is, I still feel 12 years old—unsure of myself, worried about making friends, and fighting off acne on my forehead. All of those challenges remain, except now I have a light bill to pay too.

fearless chronicles: take control of your social media

The other day I was hanging with a friend and their partner. We were discussing Tiktok and the type of content that pops up on our respective feeds. My friend’s partner commented that they wished they could see the type of content we see and sort of threw up their hands as if Tiktok had condemned them to the unfunny side of the app.

fearless chronicles: is therapy all it's cracked up to be?

As a self-proclaimed fearless woman, I thought for 2023, I could talk about the tools that have helped me become a better, more self-aware person. I should preface that I am not a perfect person and I do not strive to be. To me, becoming “THAT GIRL” as Tiktok likes to call any self-assured woman, is about finding peace in solitude, practicing mental and physical wellness, and building healthy relationships with others. It is not about reaching perfection or becoming someone without basic human emotions.

If You Have to Beg, It's Not For You

So, the other day I had a major breakthrough in therapy. I discovered that for most of my life, I have felt the intense need to prove myself to everyone around me. The more distant and disapproving someone was, the more I felt the need to win them over. So much so that I felt annoyed with people who loved me for me, no strings attached.

10 Shows/Movies That Ooze Summer

It’s summer, and it’s time to take that after-pool day shower (a top-tier human experience) and sit down to watch a binegable show. It can be hard to find shows that capture the season, but look no further because I have compiled a list of ten shows that express June-August perfectly!

Girl, Get Out of That Small Town

Just a few days ago, I finished my first year of law school. It took 15 hours of testing and many research and writing assignments to close the door on the first chapter of my legal career. I was and still am pretty wiped out. No one tells you how strange you will feel after finally achieving something you never thought would end, but yeah— it’s really weird. After your adrenaline has been pumping for two weeks straight, you feel a crash. There’s a moment when you realize that the academic validation didn’t feel as good as you imagined it would.

A New Year, A New You!

Hey, besties! Long time no post. Truth time: I have not been as consistent with posting as I planned before beginning this law school journey. Maybe you can relate? Was there something you planned to do this year and totally dropped the ball? Luckily for me and you, we can always make a fresh start, and not just because a new year is approaching. You can choose any day as your new year.

Life Update: Law School & ✨Adulthood ✨

Woah girlies it’s been more than a minute since we last spoke. I can’t believe it’s already October aka Spooky Season! Law school has a way of making time seem slow when you want to speed up and fast when you want to slow down. And the only reason I’m able to write this post is that I’m on fall break, and I knew I had to squeeze some time in to update you all on life as it is now.

Why Self-Love Seems Rebellious

I’ve watched Olympic gymnastics for as long as I can remember. I was named after Olympic gold medalist, Dominique Dawes. I bought books and watched documentaries about Gabby Douglas leading up to and after the 2012 Summer Olympics, hoping to understand more about the petite, but powerful young woman. And slightly related, I was obsessed with the ABC Family show, Make It or Break It, a tv drama about young gymnasts trying to accomplish their Olympic dreams. I say all this to say that when it’s time to watch the U.S. Olympic Gymnastics Team, I am all in.

When Being the Main Character Goes Wrong

Just a couple of scrolls through Instagram, Tiktok, or really any social media platform, you will run into a message about taking charge of your life and “being the main character”. This “main character” message has become so prevalent that just the other day, I saw back-to-back videos encouraging me to “stop being a side character in my own life”. At its core, there is a wholesome message of self love, but it's important not to warp the message into self-centeredness.

6 Ways to Incorporate Sustainability Into Your Summer

My sustainability journey really began in January 2020. I was watching a BestDressed YouTube video when she explained why she thrifts much of her clothing. It intrigued me that a majority of her fabulous collection was secondhand. I couldn’t believe that you could be so fashionable and environmentally ethical. This shock led me to research just how much of an impact fast fashion has on the environment. And I made the decision to only thrift my clothes for a whole year.

Choosing People Who Choose You

I swear I’m not trying to flex when I say this, but my heart is a little too big. By that I mean, it’s too open and available. All it takes is one positive interaction for me to care about someone and to invest in their feelings towards me. The problem with keeping a “For Rent” sign on your heart is that you remain in a constant state of instability and unease.

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Now That My Frontal Lobe Has Developed....

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